Ronney had asked me to pass by his office because we had business to discuss. I knew he was madly in love with the idea of getting to bone me one day, but I had never been desperate enough to allow it. I use the word desperate intentionally, because he was a married man.

Amidst my bouts with horniness; I’m constantly shuffling between, ‘I’m young and hot and I should fuck more because life is short’ and ‘eew I don’t want anyone to touch me.’

I’ve definitely let people who should have never had the chance, touch me; and even though I hold no regrets, they were definitely learning points for future reference, for when I’m ovulating and I need to remember it’s never really worth it unless I can have sex within a situation that feels uber safe.

I come across his type often, in fact, they are the most ‘SINGLE’ demographic you will ever meet in my city- Yes, you read right, the married men are more OUTSIDE than anyone else. I had avoided being anywhere alone with him for the longest time; like when he offered to drop me off on a night out after wine and laughter with our friends.

‘Please allow me to get you home safe, it’s the least I can do to show gratitude for your amazing company this evening…’ He requested for the umpteenth time. I knew better than to get in the car of a married man, or even worse, show a man I don’t trust where I live. I declined and told him he could have the pleasure of paying for my uber as I rang the driver that was already on their way to me. I loved how it frustrated him that I never budged but on the other hand, I was aware that my body could betray me hence I kept a healthy distance always.

XX

The first time I met Ronney, he saw me at a restaurant I was at for dinner on my own and he was over with a group of men. He’s a short man, dark beautiful skin and a nice build, I liked the way he looked, he’s cute and wore Tom Ford, Black Orchid, a scent etched in my memory for years now and not for the best of reasons either. I own a bottle that sits on my dresser half full for years.

He sent over one of the most expensive bottles of my favorite kind of wine to my table and this definitely caught my attention.

Before leaving, he came by to compliment my dress and beauty and hoped that he’d got the wine right, a beautiful bottle for a gorgeous woman, he likened me. I noticed his wedding ring immediately he handed me his card and was left wondering whether he was flirting or just being kind. I admit that I’ve been oblivious to some social cues because I’m very much used to people being very kind and generous with me. He looked really good in his tailored suit and I remember going home to smell my own bottle of Black Orchid just to relive his smile and the way he looked at me.

He’s married.

This kept me at bay until thoughts of texting him to say thank you for the wine started creeping up. Oh, he had cleared my bill too and kept an open tab on his name in case a friend would be joining me. Surely, the least I could do was text him to say thank you and only that, right?

Weeks passed and I forgot about it. Yeah, I truly did, there was nothing more special about him, I was used to this kind of generosity and attention, he was just one of them, being kind and that’s it… until one day I pull up to a meeting at the same restaurant with a few colleagues and guess who is right there? Gorgeous Ronney.

‘You never called,’ was the first thing he said to me as I got round to say hi to the whole table and he stood up to say hello. I could tell he felt pinched by the fact that I didn’t, but now more than ever, if we were going to work with each other, I needed the environment to remain very professional. I already knew he was a man of means because I had googled him- duuh! And proximity would definitely improve my business life.

On this day, he was dressed way more casually and looked even hotter, we were introduced formally and ended up sharing the evening at one table and that’s how he managed to acquire my phone number. The night ended in lots of wine and him practically begging to make sure I got home safe by driving me there himself. I was too vulnerable to accept and he let it go. He drove my dream car and this piece of info always had him trying to entice me with the endless possibilities if I accepted to be his girlfriend. I’m not going to lie, having a feel of the driver’s seat once in a while excited me and when he let me test drive once, it rewired my brain and hastened dreams that once seemed so far-fetched.

We started speaking more after then and I was able to share my plans within which I’d have loved to plug him into for a collaboration or possible investment and in a short time, work was heading in the right direction with him keeping it respectful. He definitely had the look of a philanderer and I wanted no parts in that for as long as I could help it but ovulation ni nani?

So, one day, a few months later, he gives me a call to pass by his office to finalize on some things he needed me to sign off on- which was awkward because I had never been to his office and I signed off on a lot of things over the phone up to now. This was mainly because he was very busy travelling around and a lot of what we were working on only needed the occasional business-over-lunch discussions. As was our normal, we decided to head out to lunch first before setting out to the office. There was a difference on this day because he was a lot more anxious than usual; I was about to find out why in a bit.

Along our short drive, he blurted it out to me, ‘Hey, I really would love to have sex with you. I respect you, but I can’t pretend that I don’t want to anymore…’

Normally I’d feel very offended but, in this moment, it was more of, ‘LOL tell me something that I don’t know!’ Maybe I didn’t feel disrespected because I had toyed around with the idea a few times… His directness turned me on; but what does this say about me?

I was about to become one of those girls I’ve looked down upon because our sins were different, only mine was worse because instead of thinking about how I can benefit the most from this connection without sleeping with him, I was only thinking about his dick.

My materialistic nature is a control method to curb my stupidity, as I have demonstrated here a few times, I’m neither immune to nature’s ways nor the occasional curiosity because I’m a human being. I’m just a girl; a very horny girl. When the 90-day rule stopped making sense to me, I started to apply the $5000 rule which always ensured that I’m not making premature decisions especially while broke and lonely, and I’m super fine with anyone calling it whatever they want but I can bet you a hundred bucks that there’s no smart woman who enjoys sex with a married man, especially for free, and hey, the price can be anything – money, time, love and attention, whatever! Just never for free.

Money makes more sense to me and I love to make it clear that I’m a gold digger. This keeps a lot of men who are not willing to spend- away from me, hence reducing the nonsense an average woman who sleeps with average men would have to endure, my control method.

This doesn’t mean that I have sex with every rich man that I meet, it just means that I cannot have sex if I don’t feel safe and well cared for.

I didn’t feel safe with Ronney, neither did I feel an ounce of being well cared for. His energy was very much thirsty and while it turned me off, I was too horny to reason. What he had just said to me sounded crazy and hot. It had made me wet. He went on…

‘Here’s the keys to my office. I’m going to go upstairs and wait for you, if you feel the same way, come to me… if not, leave the keys in my car and I’ll have someone drive you home. We can talk tomorrow and I’ll understand if this was offensive or you’d like to stop working around me.’

Hmmm. Crazy right? Because, wasn’t I supposed to sign some stuff? So, was I just supposed not to and go home?

Yes, that was exactly what I should have done. Requested the driver to take me home, actually, called my own uber.

I wasn’t offended though, at least not because of what he had said. I could tell he really struggled around me and I appreciated his honesty. However, I was wondering what about me showed him that I’d be tolerating of a married man, did my energy read ‘side-chick’?? Was I being too nice with my kindness and encouraging his affinity to promiscuity? I’m not going to lie, I never once stopped my wild thoughts to think about how his wife felt, she never once crossed my mind- No guilt, no remorse- just feral desire for a man to stick his member in me and fuck me till I scream his name. Could he see right through my toughness?

I was horny. I was more than horny and going home to a dry phone.

Of course, I knew going home would be the right decision but y’know what?

I’M YOUNG AND HOT, I SHOULD BE HAVING SEX!

Once that little sentence pops up in my brain, it’s kind of difficult to fight against it, I start finding stupid reasons to justify the fact that I have needs too.

A lot of you reading this are already probably annoyed with or disappointed by me after reading to this point, but can we not act like this isn’t something that is happening or worse even, there aren’t women who are in love with married men?

I picked the keys to his office, alighted his gorgeous car and walked towards his office; this whole time, part of me trying to be rational and the other already imagining how he would fuck me once I entered that room.

It was a clean office, looked like men occupied it, but the opulence was evident. The furniture and carpets alone screamed ‘I can change your life’ but my heart was beating now because I couldn’t stop myself from the way my body was reacting. I was hot all over, in a top that accentuated my perky breasts and high waisted pants that hugged my hips and sensationalized my sway as I strutted in my high heels. He was sat on his desk and I went straight to the chair right opposite of his.

‘You have a lovely office, and oh we have the same computer, what a coincidence…’ I said awkwardly as I watched his face salivate over me, the man was hungry and ready to pounce. It was so evident that he was happy I chose to come to him, how bad can it be? I’ll just get some dick and leave.

‘Yeah, it means we are alike, that’s why you came upstairs instead of leaving… right? My wife will be here in approximately 35 minutes, I want to fuck you on this table right now, before she arrives.’

As a reader, you might be struggling and judging, It gets worse…  this is the disclaimer.

Ronney walked across his table to me and took my hand then placed it on his crotch so I could feel the hard bulge from his pants. His huge glass windows were very clear, anybody across the building would see us if they paid close attention and for some reason, this got my adrenaline running even more, high risk, high reward. He leaned in for a kiss then dug his hand straight down my pants to feel my moist vagina and I immediately let out a sigh of pleasure, oh it felt so good, I hadn’t been touched or fucked in so long!

He took off my clothes then undressed and carried me on to the top of his table, over the paperwork. For a moment I was worried about if he had cameras recording in there, but my judgment was too clouded at this point, I just needed a nut. He kissed me all over my body, my neck and chest, my thighs oh I was in heaven and the fear of getting caught made this experience even more dangerous aka better.

‘You better wear a condom or we’re not fucking,’ I’m always stern about this, it would be foolish for me to think that I was the only girl he was chewing on the side, a man like him, he had it all written in his eyes, easy target for me too because it meant that we didn’t have to talk afterwards, I just wanted some dick… and tongue on my pussy. This man went on his knees and worshipped my vagina like a man possessed with spirit at a choir, oh he sang! He hit every note with his tongue and just as I was about to scream, he stopped and lay his clothes on the carpet then carefully placed me on top and started to look for a condom.

‘Have you locked the door?’ I asked as I stood up to check, he stopped me then sat on a chair and ushered me to get on top.

‘No,’ he nodded from side to side with a very sly smile while caressing my breasts and sniffing on my chest like it was dusted with cocaine, he was high off me, drooling like a rabid dog.

I knew what he was doing, this is a very dangerous game. I liked it. We were already sweaty, the air filled with electric sexual energy and his dick harder than a pole.

Ronney stuck his dick into me, I had been waiting for this feeling for months. Months!!

And I felt, NOTHING.

I couldn’t feel him inside me.

I thought maybe I was too wet, or I don’t know… but, it was nothing, and it took him all of 7 pumps to nut.

What a waste of sin.

17 mins till the wife arrives.

He pulled me in to kiss me, caressing my body but in this moment, I felt so dirty. Like I had been used as a cum sack… He lay me on the floor and got on top of me again, my heart was beating really fast, 15 mins left…

I swear to god I felt nothing and I knew why. It wasn’t about him or his dick, I just had no emotional connection to him. The foreplay got me higher than the penetration and I realized even my vagina knew he wasn’t supposed to be inside me, I was being cheap and desperate. I was being a horny woman, an adult with choice.

I got off him and wore my clothes as fast as I could and picked my stuff up, then left for the bathroom. The room was a mess, like a fight had ensued on his desk but that was none of my business, 10 mins.

I don’t know what his wife looks like but I probably passed her on my way out because while in the washroom, he texted to say that she was in the elevator on her way to him.

I called my ride and went home. Deleted his phone number and emailed to terminate our working relationship. I felt no guilt, just annoyed that it wasn’t worth the risk. He never stopped calling me.

I stopped frequenting the restaurant where we first met for a while but when I went back, he was there with another girl, much younger and very pretty. We didn’t say hi but he called me that night again, begging for a chance to speak.

I had to do better.

There’s no saying that I would have still deleted his number if he had fucked me good, so maybe I was being protected by the universe? He called me again this week, I didn’t pick up so he left a message to say that my tab at the restaurant is always taken care of, I didn’t respond. I walked to my dresser and opened the Black Orchid bottle to get a whiff and it smelled like a lot of bad decisions.

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